i lonely tears tears tears

day 4 ....... give it up for day 4 .......!!!!!!!

listen if i see keyword lonely in someone's profile their chances of getting a friend rq from me shoot up by a gazillion imsorry 

TW implied sa(?)

day 4 of me being a whiny bitch <3 i posted something akin to this on tumblr day 1 but in short i want a partner or boyfriend of some sort .... not like edating or anything i wanna cuddle and such and such and ALSO i just want irl friends in general....

and like im p sure the scene i want to talk to doesn't want to talk to me . like gyaru talk to gyaru goths talk to goths emos talk to emos they don't tend to mingle . but i want to mingle like the only goths ive spoken to are my family (im the only one not goth LMAO). i want to know someone edgy but also is smart and respects me and listens to me . i want someone to use my neos and i dont want to be touched but i do but just a little bit not really and IM GONNA GET SCARED I KNOW IT so i know this will pass and ill be like [bts celibacy gif] once again

but like . idk. ive dated before and i didnt like it but idk if its bc they couldnt keep their hands off me or bc i was dating someone . i could also try a qpr see if thats any different

idk im confused my brain is fried from trauma idk what i want or like if someone chooses to speak to me in such a way you'll have to treat me like a skittish stray cat that keeps hissing at u i hate hate hate being ill and like i cant use dating apps cuz theyre full of NORMIES that prob wont respect me and definitely wont be able to relate to me sobs . dating apps scare me anyway i had tinder for less than 24 hrs before deleting it

idk lil rant-vent mayb delete idk idk listen to love and joy hmu if u want a stray angry alley cat of a person