love, real love

what a fucking interesting topic. i’ve been in love a lot of times, or so i’ve thought. don’t get me wrong, i have felt so strongly about people that it physically aches- but i don’t know that it was really love. i’m realizing now that maybe a lot of that ache came from them, they hurt me and i didn’t feel that pain solely because i loved them, i felt it because perhaps they were the ones who wronged me. i’ve spent far too long convincing myself that i am the one who has ruined everything, but these days i’m a bit less confident that’s the case. i’m in love now, real love. and it’s different and the ache is gone.