Mental Health Stuff

Anyone else struggle with plans suddenly changing or routines changing cos i fucking do and i hate it so much. i wish i was neurotypical and could be impulsive but it stresses me out so much. today I'm hanging out with mates and suddenly the plan changed and instantly my heart is going 100mph and i cant breathe. i hate my brain for being like this and yeah there are ways i have learnt to cope but it just fucking sucks to be the one guy constantly asking questions like 'where are we going, what time , how are we getting there?'. even though all my friends are very understanding i still feel like im annoying them all the time. i know im not the only person this happens to but everytime without a doubt that i start struggling i instantly feel so alone. anyway im gonna end this rant but yeah , i hate changes in plans.