depressed ramblings

everything is just shit rn lol

i feel like have like, zero future. everyone else is talking about college and moving on with their lives but i still feel stuck in eighth grade

why am I not growing??? why can't i just...wake up?? everyone else can do it, why cant I

why cant i wake up i want to wake up let me wake up I want to wake up

i dont want people looking at me like im a failure

i dont want to lose my friends because i just cant get better

i put on a fake smile and I'm there for everyone else all the time because I cant show people im sad but im so so so sad im so fucking sad 

i cant move i feel frozen let me un freeze

why cant I just get fucking better???