I LOVE HIM SO MUCH 🖤☠️

I have been crushing over this guy for at least the day he started he talking to me on here back around September or October  6-7 months and the around the end of march .. ILL SAY IT AT THE END !!!

anyways so at the beginning when he texted me i thought to myself wow an emo friend who lives in Spain, super cool I never had an emo friend who speaks Spanish. i don't really know his real name but I gave him a nick name which was crouton since i really like croutons XDD, (he told me his name was dark).  SO we started talking more and more about of our self's, such a weird friendship because usually when I make friends on spacehey we stop talking after 4 days or a week, it was different this time we never stopped talking and i think there was some weird tension but i wasn't sure i mean he such a cool person and looks very pretty x) like who would someone looking super cool and kind talk to me, yk?? but later like in November we moved on insta to talk since it was much easier to get notifications. that's month is when i made it clear to myself that I really did like him, I've been crushing on him all these months. ITS CRAZYYYY i was obsessed, I didn't know if he felt the same, but I never told him about my feelings, I felt like he only saw me as a friend. around December I think I tired showing a bit of affection when it was, he's birthday I drew him cake and everything, he liked it which made me happy. although that month I thought I was just obsessed and didn't like him at all, around that day I got with someone since I have been talking to them for a while, i forgot a bit about crouton and that I liked so much because i really loved my ex. around Jan i broke up with, my ex since my mental health was so horrible, i felt bad. But i always kept talking to crouton, since I didn't have a lot of people to talk to. but anyways as days went by it was already February, me and my friend would talk about crouton and I said Ima make a wedding playlist as a joke, we kept the playlist and like I know maybe I won't marry him one day, but I wanna imagine it because I knew someday, I had to tell him how I felt. I joked around saying Ima marry I'm (might not happened idk LOL) by march I started to recover with my mental health problems since I got helped, one day I was talking to my friends about crouton and how he was cool (I've never been so obsessed with anyone I'm for real) so my friend said dude you should definitely ask him out what if he stops talking to you and likes someone else, and I was like i will never tell him since I don't wanna ruin our friendship because I really have a good friendship and what if he rejects me and dose not wanna be friends with me anymore. we stayed a bit like that. There was a point where I would dream about him a few times which was strange to me. as days went by it was around Saturday I went to a hockey game with my friend and for some reason it was a good idea to tell them, "dude what if I confess to him right now like I'm not scared to tell him and if he rejects me it's not like I could just block him" and my friend responded with "DUDE DO IT , I'll tell you what to say" SO WE DID it I told him but since we live in different places I waited till the morning to see if he respond so that night I didn't even go on insta or checked my phone i Stright went to sleep and that night i had dreamed about him. THE NEXT DAY first thing I did was to check my phone and i was really scared and nervous to see what he had said, AND YOU Know WHAT HE SAID, bro said he liked me for months too!!!!!! LIKE AINT NO WAY, THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING HE LIKES ME BACKKKKK HEHEHEHDEHe 

SO, THEN I WAS LIKE OMG IMA ASK HIM TO BE MY BF NOW.. AND I DID AND HE SAID YES AND I WAS LIKE OMG UR MY BOYFRIEND NOWW AND NOW TODAY WHICH IS 4/6/24 and tomorrow is going to be two weeks that we have been together and I'm so happy. I hope we don't have any fall downs or anything because I am genuinely so in love with him like I could talk about him for hours and not stop. like I can see were both together living in a small house in the middle of nowhere, just peace and rain or snow. drinking coffee and just chilling around with bunch of cats and goats. It might not happen, but this is just what I think :) and it okay with if he ever wants to leave me or if he falls out of love. all I care is that I'm with him now and I'm super happy because he is the sweetest, funny and handsome person ever!!!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCHHHHH 

anyways (sorry if my spelling is bad...)

SONG:

"Maybe we're meant to lose the ones we love