I Sort of Miss How I Used To Make Friends

Which, if anyone reading this knows me, is weird asf. Mainly because before my current group of friends I had a pretty consistent pattern of how I would make and keep friends.

Basically, I would make 1 to 4 irl friends, maximum, and then I would hang out with them at school, and outside of school every couple of weeks. And those friendships would last me probably half a year on average.

And then I’d go online and I don’t even know where I’d meet half the people I did, but I had so many online friends that I’d spend hours rotating between them all because I had friends with multiple different time zones and interests- I never had no one to talk to, because someone was always online with something to talk about.

And then I moved out of my parents house which also (due to other circumstances) coincided with deleting all social media accounts I had, and the email I used for them all, and actually met decent people irl. And what that all means is now I have this huge circle of irl friends, but after getting social media again to keep in touch with my irl friends I haven’t gone out of my way to meet people online anymore. It doesn’t help that I don’t really feel like I have the time to be chronically online like I used to.

Trying to use this website and other “small web” community places is sort of a vague step in the direction of meeting people online, but it’s really not the same anymore, idk. Talking to people online now never lasts long any more, but some of that too might be because I’ve come out of my shell more, and so I’m more talkative and that can get annoying af.

And none of this is to say that I don’t want my circle of friends (even though sometimes the size means it’s more drama than it’s worth T^T) but I wish I could meet and hold relationships with people I meet online like I used to. Cause I feel both more and significantly less isolated compared to when I was younger.