Absent father (need advice!!)

Ok giys I need some help/advice!!! I have an absent father and I’m not gonna get into to much detail about that whole backstory but lately he’s been trying to reconnect with me (kinda?) after all these years. He’s been calling me and leaving voicemails saying that he just wants to check up on me or talk to me. I deny the calls or just let them ring bc every time I do pick up I feel as if I’m gonna burst into tears bc of all of my unresolved issues. I want to talk to him but then again it’s hard, I’m not that little kid anymore. What do I do?