social media isn't fulfilling but i can not stop coming back: a rant.

social media is so so so active in my life, probably a lot of everybody's lives aswell, but i will be honest it is a giant aspect of my life to an unhealthy degree. it's all scrolling, tapping, reading, but it is never actually fulfilling. i can laugh at a joke on twitter all i want, or find super cute art on tiktok, maybe even smile at the posts of clothes on Instagram, but i am never coming out feeling 'good' and not a 'bad' either. it's this numbness, and just a longing to just get right back to scrolling, because it's an infinite content dump with no end... 

if im being honest, being on social media almost 90% of the day is a weird indescribable feeling of just kinda 'eh' and wanting to do something more FUN.. buttttttt  i don't, because then i wouldn't be scrolling?.. yk? 

it's like eating beef stroganoff for me: i don't exactly enjoy the meal, but i will finish the whole meal if it's offered, and go and go and go, even if it doesn't satisfy me truly in the end. i am just sitting around chewing on that 'just okay' tasting noodle, and feeling happy at the few pieces of meat thrown inside of it aswell, for HOURS. i get it, the rabbit carrot stick dynamic  is what makes these sites and apps really get their dollars, but i wish it didn't have to take the ability to even walk away from the screen for a bit. being addicted to the mindless content is the whole POINT of these types of layouts, and it's always tough realizing i spent the day doing absolutely nothing again because i just spent it scrolling on content i don't even care much for!

tldr: do a detox b4 it is too late and ure online 24/7 longing to do smth more fun than refreshing twitter for the 3rd time