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~Sympathizing w Randy Stair/Andrew Blaze

Just to get it out of the way, this isn't condoning what they did.

When I was publicly identifying as male I was a lot more suicidal than I've ever been. I realized that it would be YEARS until anyone actually viewed me as male, so I felt that if I could just die I could "escape" the body that wasn't "valid enough" for everyone else to respect me. I literally imagined myself somehow having a body that I was happier with after death just because that idea comforted me in a way that I could achieve in no other way, even when I'd stopped believing in afterlife for a while by that point. This was a few years before I ever even heard abt Randy/Andrew (I'm pretty sure this was even before they'd done it.)

It rubs me the wrong way that LGBT mental health is such a little talked about topic that everyone just says "he said he was trans at the last second to garner sympathy." The majority of the American political public is pretty unsympathetic toward & quick to judge the LGBT community. If they were faking something for sympathy they'd just pull the good ol' "I'm crazy" or "I was touched" that we see in almost every case of a murderer like this faking something for sympathy.

That being said, flipping a coin to pick between just shooting yourself or making a big scene of it by killing others first is pretty stupid.

I'm blazed (pun intended) writing this so don't totally crucify me.

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