I guess I am using this site to vent lol

Maybe I really can't relate to many people now that I am finally getting older. I am a recluse and I wish that I could break out of it, but it seems that I can't. I don't understand why it's so much harder to make lifelong friends at this age or at least make friends for a little while.

I struggle so hard with fitting in wherever I end up and I think I am getting sick of it. I hate that if you aren't basic in a world of npc's you are usually excluded from everything that's considered "fun"... 

I honestly just sometimes wish I could disappear or run away...