Third Quarter

I hated it, I hated it so much. This is seriously like the last time I felt productive, I feel so numb and exhausted, I need to recharge everything out of myself and just take a big huge nap but never waking up again. 

Where do I even start off? Doing history notes was already bad enough, it got me staying up to 12 forcefully and that just makes me so drowsy in the morning. I’ve been waking up really late to school, so late I kind of just don’t care anymore, it really sucks but oh well I guess I have to deal with it. I usually bike my way to school but since I’ve been drained out to misery I had to get dropped off, waiting at the attendance office is kind of lame too… It’s annoying how long the line can get, and what gives? Why can’t I just show my id and get it over with, I have to sign a sheet, enter my id and then receive a slip to turn to my teacher. I’m lucky enough that sometimes when I’m late, the front gate still opens so I can slip through without entering the attendance office, but one of my first period teacher is very strict on attendance, which is fair, but my science teacher doesn’t bother, I’m so grateful honestly. 

School would’ve been fine if I wasn’t forced to take these hard ass advanced classes honestly. Ugh and ever since that my hormones have been acting up, but luckily my face has been clearing a lot. It’s my history class that really takes the cake. I love sleeping. But I barley have any time since I was studying for my history exam all night, but when I finally did my exam I probably did pretty good… I really hope so, I wrote a lot of random gibber and facts that I really hope would give me full points, it doesn’t really matter to me now, I have all As this quarter which I’m actually so relived and happy. 

Math is my weakest subject too, but my teacher is at least considerable about grades. I still hate math, I hate it. I could never understand it, I never will, and I know people say to get those high paying jobs is to be good at math but I wouldn’t care. 

At least my friends are supportive of me, and I finally got together with my partner. I really do appreciate love and sympathy. I get tired, so tired. I’m speaking this out of my tongue, silently, I want to forget everything, and live with my partner in a house so homey, the big bed and the comforting cold weather. I love being treated like royalty, I love being pampered, I love the care of the world that offers to me. I want to have it forever. 

I tell myself sometimes that god has forsaken me, but when I talk about god, I talk about my life, and the universe, and how it treats me. That’s what I think of god. God is omnipresent.

Signing out, 

xoxo