feels weird to live a nice life?

i´ve been struggling mentally all my teenage years, was self-sabotaging, abusing substances, been in abusive relationships...only found some meaning and goals in life as i found my faith about 3 years ago. i´m in a healthy relationship now with a man i can see my future with and i´ve been staying away from substances for years. still struggling for sure but much better mentally. my attachment is fucked up but i´m trying not to lose myself in my significant other and not be 100% dependant. anyways, as i get older and life goes on i have to start taking action to build my life. i´m in my final year of school, leaving this "safe place" (don´t get me wrong, i hate school with a passion and it´s messing with my health big time, BUT it´s what i´ve known for the past like 13 years.) and i´m planning to move out with my boyfriend. for reference, i moved out of my parents house when i was seventeen and been renting a room at a ladys (and her fams) place. i´m still a kid tho and i have to learn to get my life together. but what´s messing with me more is the fact that...life can get...good? it´s obscure to me i even have a long term relationship i am happy in, but moving in too?? planning to get married and future and stuff???? i´m ready to commit, that´s not the problem here. it´s the thought...like...how did i end up here? "too good to be true" stuff. like, i should be doing drugs and get beaten up somewhere. should´ve been six foot under by now. idk. it´s unexpected. i´m excited, but also overwhelmed !