Music writing and recording stuff as a child with no money isnt fun

i am a loser who loves to write music and can play drums and guitar but i have no monye for recording stuff and editing software. i have shitty garageband demos but also they are extremely shitty. i need to go to a vocal coach to learn how to sing or maybe get a friend who can sing. i know music theory and compose often and would love to start a band but i am nervous around people. i could do it solo and i know that but also my voice sucks and i fr need a singer. i can also make synth bass but once i get a bass guitar its OVER i will be unstoppable muahahahahhhahah