I love her. UPDATE!!

Dang it where do I start. So recently I have been catching feelings for this one girl. I met her on here and she is like my best friend (not me praying as we speak that she doesn't read this blog cause that would be... interesting). 

So about this girl. We have been talking pretty much every day and we have grown to be really close. I am afraid though about what she would think of me. We are in a band together, she is my guitarist and I am the vocalist. my other best friend is on drums. Our plan is for all three of us to live together after we graduate high school soon.

I want to ask her out to the senior prom. She said yes she would be more than willing to since her school is different than mine but the thing is, I didn't ask her out as my date. (yet). I'm so scared of what she will think of me when we meet. We have FaceTimed before and we know what the other looks like, I really really like her. She is the most perfect person I have ever met but I am scared that she won't like me because of reasons like: 

1. I'm only 5,6 in height and Im a guy. what if I'm too short? 2. I look like a rockstar, talk and act like one but what if she thinks I'm nerdy, weird, or cringey? 3. I have a high pitched voice that I'm extremely embarrassed of. 4. I'm just an ugly waste of time and I get rejected or cheated on by everyone so honestly I wouldn't be surprised if she laughed in my face if I confessed. 

I'm not a bad person or partner, I just fell in love with the wrong shitty people back then. but this one for some reason, I feel a weirdly good connection. she makes me happy every time we talk and I can't stop smiling. We live very far away from each other but regardless, I think I love her guys. I just don't know when or really how to tell her cause what if she gets in a relationship before I ask her out to prom? what should I do? 

UPDATE!!!!

so I ended up confessing and telling her everything and how I felt. It went well!! 

I'm like super happy about this. Since we are long distance and have different time zones (quite literally a 12 hour difference) we are gonna wait to date until we meet in person which is in exactly two years. 

If she is seeing this I want her to know that I would do anything for her and would bring down the stars if I could, I would give the world and everything in it for you. I have never felt like this about anyone ever before. The other times with anyone else never felt as real and happy as this time with you.

I even asked if she wanted to be my prom date (which she said yes to also).

I love her and I am willing to wait an eternity if I have to just so I can be with her someday.