will i beat life or will life beat me?

my dad went to rehab for the 5th time and its messed me up so bad that i actually cant get up to get ready for school

thankfully my mom is letting me not go today

i really dont wanna go for the entire week because i cant survive without crying rn and i dont wanna start bawling my eyes out in the middle of a hallway with immature 14 year old boys who think everything is funny like omg shut the fuck up i hope you actually get beheaded by a guillotine