Youth Is Dead (To Me)

18:30

Today, i was supposed to be in school

socializing with my classmates and catching up with friends,

but i dislike superficiality and pretending to care about others

so i passed and stayed at home playing videogames.

"That's depressing", you might think...

...because it is.

Someday, i'll be in my hospital bed reflecting about my youth days and think...

Damn, i really fumbled the bag.

Which is funny, because if i was given the option to change my ways,

i wouldn't take it because it would be pointless, because as Hachiman said:

If wishes could be granted, if desires could be fulfilled, then I wouldn't wish for or desire anything after all. The things you're handed on a silver platter are never genuine and never everlasting: and that is why I'll always keep searching [for something genuine].

...

Well, that quote doesn't really applies to me, i think this one is more fitting:

A person who isn't willing to change won't change.

Man, i wish i could be both cool and depressed.

Or maybe only cool.

...

Whatever, i'm just gonna spend the rest of my days in solitude.