tw dissociation. personal rant.

i swear to god nothing feels real anymore. my dissociation has gotten so bad that its just constant numb and derealization 24/7. this has to be some sort of severe dissociative disorder or something because my brain is physically incapable of registering reality as an actual place. its getting worse everyday. i dont even know who i am anymore , sometimes i find myself questioning if i even know my own parents or not. i literally feel like a fictional character more than i feel like my own body. i feel so disconnected and detached from everything and its fucking chronic too. i can barely recognize my own room even though im in there 90% of the time. i literally do not know what to do anymore.