I'm tired

Sometimes I feel uncomfortable with my own existence, I feel strange, strange, it doesn't matter if I try to joke the same way, make the same comments, movements or attitudes of others, or I'm just a lifeless bag of meat that does nothing, no It doesn't matter how normal I dress, how normal I sound, I will never be more than a weird person, it hurts me more when they say it to me in front of me, I know it's a joke, but I really try, I try not to be weird, I try to be the same. more normal, I have lowered my performance at school, I am ashamed to say how I feel, admitting that I feel sad in front of my friends is embarrassing, because I know what kind of people they are, they are kind people but they don't care about that, it's not because bad, it's just not nice to hear that from someone every day, I just avoid it, but I hate to think that everyone sees me as lazy and without a job. I feel like shit, I feel like I'm just making excuses, but no matter what I do, I can't help but feel tired in the morning even if I sleep from the afternoon until the next day.