so angry & sad

Ugh, today was supposed to be the day I finally mustered up the courage to ask my crush, codename Star, to hang out. I spent hours rehearsing what to say in front of the mirror, trying to sound cool and confident. And when the moment finally came, my heart was pounding so loud I thought he could hear it.

I walked up to him, my palms sweaty and my voice shaking, and asked him if he wanted to hang out sometime. But instead of the response I was hoping for, he told me he already had plans to hang out with a group of other girls. A group of other girls? Seriously? My heart sank like a stone.

I tried to hide my disappointment and smile, but inside I was crumbling. Why did he have to choose them over me? What do they have that I don't? It hurt so much to see him walk away with them, laughing and chatting like I never even existed.

Those other girls, ugh! Who do they think they are, stealing my moment with Star? I can't help but feel a pang of jealousy and resentment towards them. Why did he have to pick them instead of just hanging out with me, even just once?

I know I shouldn't be mad at them; they probably didn't even know how much this meant to me. But it's hard not to feel hurt and upset. It feels like a dagger to the heart every time I think about it.

So here I am, sitting alone in my class, feeling rejected and invisible. Crushed dreams and a broken heart. Maybe one day I'll muster up the courage to try again, but for now, I'll just wallow in my angst and wonder why things never seem to go my way.

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