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It's currently 1am as I am typing this. I had a fulfilling day today (At least in my opinion.) I figured the last thing to do before going to bed is sitting down and blogging about my spring break. Just a good way to wrap things up yk? 0_0
As I've mentioned like... probably multiple times the first thing on my spring break was a huge mental breakdown, followed by a breakup. I won't really get into details, but it was definitely a way to start the break. It's left me quite heartbroken and pining.
I ended up isolating myself more than usual, but not really in a destructive way. For the first two days I was struggling but I realized that I needed to get up and start something, anything to get me out of the house, to get me to reflect and practice mindfulness and not spiral until my therapy session. I went to go workout, I talked with my best friend, and I even went to band session at my friend's house to practice our setlist! (-ᴗ-) (Only problem was that all the songs were coincidentally relatable breakup songs, which I had to sing... </3)
My mom took me out thrifting, and I've gotten cuter clothes. I feel sad spending money because we had planned to see each other someday. The more money I spend the more guilty I feel. I hope to get a job soon just to earn some money.
I listened to a lot of music, and I worked on some of my animation that I'm supposed to be doing. I spent a lot of time on here, mainly working on my layout. I've been listening to a LOT of Pierce the Veil and crying. (Listening to PTV makes me think of them ha.)
I actually started working out too. I plan to really commit to it. (I haven't been walking on days where I don't workout tho... -_- UGH!) Overall I just feel different. I'm nervous to go back to school, I kind of want to keep isolating myself. It's a sort of peaceful isolation, if anything.
This spring break was a rollercoaster. I spent most of it online but also outside, on my own. These next 3 months before I graduate are going to go by fast, I hope I improve immensely during that time. On the bright side this is a new leaf, I definitely had a break that I feel content with aside from the breakup. ;_;
Okay well goodnight everyone, luv ya.
xoxo Felix
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Rory :3
ahhh its great that youre really committing yourself to your hobbies and working out!! ^_^ And taking a break from other people to be alone and reflect on what happened is a good action to take as well, simply ignoring and pretending it didnt happen doesnt help all. Hope you have a good nights rest<33333
Yes, I've been trying to reflect to improve myself. I really hope we can be on good terms, and hopefully more. It gets harder to believe the last part every day but I've recently accepted that this journey to self healing is for me not for us.
by Rosesofblood; ; Report
Acceptance is one of the first steps to moving forward, and its great youve come to terms with that :))) of course there will be mishaps along the way where you might find yourself stuck or even moving back instead of forward, but things like that are bound to happen. Whats important is that you get yourself into that positive headspace so you can make those decisions on what feels right for you<333333
by Rory :3; ; Report