its just weird

has it been months again? I don't really remember lol. FYI this might just be me yapping or venting either way, you're welcome to listen in and cringe or whatever. I don't even know where to start, I feel like I'm waking up from this deep depression I've been going through. finally seeing the signs that I am unwell. noticing the patterns of my day-to-day life. for a while, and maybe still, I've been unable to leave my bed until 3pm even though I've been awake hours before. while stuck in bed, I long to play the games I've bought and only barely started or I want to draw. I just can't gather enough motivation to do it. 

not only that but my self-esteem has been wearing down on my relationship, and I can't bring myself to be in the mood. (I'll stop there cause I don't want to get too personal about that)

honestly, I think I will stop here before becoming too depressing/vent-like. 

I recently just got an appointment to try and get medicated for my depression, hopefully, it goes well!