Rant/Ramblepost

Days later I can say I still hate being attracted to people. One of my friends (who I kinda have a crush on for whatever reason idk my brain is weird) was talking about wanting to go to the aquarium bc they're rlly into marine animals and stuff. We have a four day weekend, so I honestly kinda thought if I brought it up maybe we could go together, yknow? But she kept talking and she said she would send me pictures if she decided to go, and now I feel awkward to even bring up going with her or doing anything. I still can't help but be upset tho. I wish I was better at just speaking my mind. But I also don't want to seem clingy or anything. I just don't know.

I hate when I get like this. I have always struggled with being close to people like this.