high school ugh...(vent)

is high school good 4 any1? like ive got a bf and like 2 good friends but still. ppl dont pay attention to me and when they do its to make fun of me or bully me. Ive been the victim of the "popular girls mock the quiet kid by pretending to care" too many times to count. ive got so much school work and stuff its hella stressful. im flunking 2 classes already and my last report card sucked (70 was my lowest grade and a <65 is failing at my school). im hella stressed abt a shit ton of things. i follow most of my grade on insta and i always get to see all those stupid preppy popular kids partying in someones hazy basement w/ whiteclaws in their hands. i wanna convince myself i dont wanna be that but at the same time i wish i was there. i wish i had somewhere to be all nite on fridays and saturdays. not only am i cursed w strict parents but also absolutely no cool points. i mean really from my style to my music taste to my interests and attitude im a complete loser. a loser w loser friends and a loser bf. dont get me wrong i love them and would never ever abandon them to be "cool" but like id like to not get pushed into lockers and laughed at. i even get side eyed on my way to eat lunch in the library since i eat there like a loner. im not even cool w the stoners.. whos not cool w the stoners?????? me apparently. when ur in the weird kid clique or nerd clique its one thing but no one ever talks abt not fitting into any of them. i try to socialize and go to mixers and stuff but still here i am w the same 3 friends counting my bf. even the theater kids are assholes to me... i have a hard time believing high school is really "the best years" of my life. or anyones for that matter like the preppy popular kids are all hungover constantly, the nerdy kids are well nerds who wont get laid, the stoners are uh well theyre having a grand time, and then theres me. i have one school friend whos my ride or die and i love her but shes very diff from me and knows everyone and everyone knows her, and if u said my name to anyone i can guarentee unless they bullied me (which even they might not know my name) no one could tell u who i was. i suppose i should be grateful for who and what i have but still, i want that cliche cool teenage life. i wanna be a nice regina george for a minute. i wanna be cool, i wanna say i was cool in highschool. i want cool stories to tell my kids abt the Jocks i was with and the crazy ragers i threw and went to the concerts i saw. but no. here i am using out dated social media, sitting in my room listening to even older music, at 12 am on a tuesday morning. i just wanna be in college somewhere far far away from here with new people, new parties, new places and a new life. maybe even a new name im not a big fan of my first name. maybe i just need to shut my computer, go off my phone, and magazines for a bit. maybe thats it, ive just been too online lately. who knows but if ur still reading this somehow thanks for listening to my insane ramblings stranger on the internet. (i probably shouldnt make this public but oh well, someone from my school follows my tumblr so cant put it there anymore)