I tell you, unknown, about my immature illusion (⁠ʃ⁠ƪ⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠）

Well, since there's no one to tell it to, I'll post it here and leave a little gossip for someone. 

A year ago, I think, mm... I used to pass by a busy street, I always did, and most of the time, I would casually bump into a guy who would always say hello to me.

Next thing, sorry but my parents taught me to be polite but they also taught me not to talk to strangers (look hahaha today I'm here telling this to strangers) 

Whenever he greeted me, I didn't greet him back because...I don't know, for that reason, I couldn't talk to strangers. 

Unlike me, he always greeted me, even if I didn't greet him back, he wasn't rude like I was.

The fact is that over the months (a couple of months) I gained confidence in him, so I already greeted him and even smiled.

He began to get closer to me, he went to my house from time to time out of trust (we were kind of like neighbors(?) (He didn't come into my house) and well, I didn't like him but I told myself "What if I like him? I mean,Everything wouldn't be so boring anymore, it's bad but maybe something nice can be given."

A That's how I made myself believe that I liked him, but no! I just forced myself to like him. 

ASome days I saw it but then there were a couple of weeks when I didn't, like that, for me it wasn't strange, it wasn't strange .

ATO But after the first time I didn't see him for a couple of weeks, when he came back, it was a little different, if I ran into him on the aforementioned street, he rarely greeted me.

He was gone again for another couple of weeks, and I now forced myself not to like him anymore.

But then it suddenly comes back, when I had already "forgotten" it, I think it was about a month later.Then I "liked" it again Because? Because that return was different, if last time he didn't even greet me, this time he went to my house to talk and so on.

And do you know what happened?Yes, he left again 

Emphasize, I made myself believe that I liked him, but I really didn't like him, I liked the idea of ​​being "in love" or something like that. 

It's wrong, I know, sorry 

Bueno, se fue, ya no me importaba, ese era su hobby, supongo.

Well he left, I didn't care anymore, that was his hobby I guess

But no, this time it was different, very different 

Sí About a month passed, and I found out that he died, last January, I didn't feel sad, just a little shocked, remember? I didn't like him, but I was used to him 

SíI still can't assimilate that I won't see him, a month has just passed but I'm not sad or anything like that, but I still don't believe it, the last time I passed by the happy street where we met, I was hoping to find him .