Entry 13 || Music Yap

I grew up in a family that absolutely loves music. My father and his friends had a small rock band called "Xerpent" back in their teenage years and my mother absolutely adored it. He was the drummer so he had (and still has) a strong sense of rhythm, and most importantly, a strong musical passion- to which he passed onto my sister and I.

When I was a kid, my mother had apparently discovered that I had a "voice" after she heard me accurately hum the tune of a cartoon show one day. She told me to try singing the song, so I did, and all the karaoke sessions started from there.

I often sang cartoon and pop songs back in the day, and for a while, I really enjoyed the childlike praise I got from aunties and uncles who'd listen to me sing. Next thing I know, I was being shoved to public stages left and right.

Meanwhile, my father would teach both my sister and I the piano, so I learned how to play Fur Elise by Beethoven at a really young age. Of course, this wasn't done without a lot of lecturing, so the first notes of the song are completely engraved in my head.

I enjoyed singing until I hit a roadblock with my voice. It just wasn't reaching the "criteria" my mother had in mind (the Taylor Swift and Arianna Grande-type of criteria). No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't get it right, so my mother took me to singing lessons for one summer in hopes to "fix it". My sister took drumming lessons as well.

That's where I finally grew conscious about my voice because I'd hear other kids who sang just as good, hell, even better. Of course, I really did try my best, and I guess it helped a little bit. At the end of the summer, I performed a song at a mall where I had an unfortunate dress malfunction while I was sitting among the crowd (if you know what that means, then I think you'll understand how traumatizing that could have been for me).

My passion for singing slowly started dying after I had to constantly deal with my mother's lecturing about how I couldn't get anything right. Gone were the karaoke sessions and stage performances because my voice had gotten too embarrassing at this point.

Did that kill my passion for music? No. It simply made me realize that I didn't wanna be under the spotlight, but instead, I wanted to be the one pulling the strings- harmonizing, unifying, and conducting every little note and rhythm of a song.

I was sitting in the car with my father while we were waiting for my mother and sister when he asked me if I could harmonize with an Ed Sheeran song he really liked. He made me listen to a song cover that had different layers of voices perfectly harmonizing with each other. In a couple minutes, I managed to harmonize with a second voice, and second voicing songs got real easy ever since. Of course they aren't perfect, but people around me still get baffled with how I come up with them so easily.

It was 2019. The pandemic struck hard, and gen Z hit this weird musical media era. Musical artists like Penelope Scott, Jack Stauber, Lemon Demon, Sodikken, Rio Romeo, and others started emerging and growing in popularity. And as a musical nerd, these artists called to me, and man did they call.

Their voices aren't perfect, I thought, but they're perfect in their own way. I couldn't believe it.

Their "imperfections" are just like my own.

I felt my passion for singing spark once again. As of now, it's still a small flame, but it's warm- and it's something I want to protect for as long as I can.

I'm not as musically active as I was back in the day, but I still set aside some time to secretly compose small songs and tunes on online google websites. I enjoy creating rhythms and harmonies free from the judgement of any set criteria.

This wasn't suppose to be a life story about my musical experience. I initially intended this to be a ramble about my musical tastes, so I guess I'll still talk about it :)

Everyone has musical stages and phases. One can go from looping Taylor Swift to blasting My Chemical Romance the next day. This is an exaggeration of course, unless someone out there actually has the most bizarre (but open-minded) taste in music.

I wouldn't call mine bizarre, but I've had classmates who've commented on my tastes. While everyone was busy listening to Doja Cat back then, I was busy listening to game soundtrack remixes and electroswings. I can sit down and understand why one could find such appeal to modern rap genres, but it's just not my calling. I prefer music with a lot of elements and instrumentals (no offense to rap).

My father, being the strong musical influence he is, pulled both my sister and I into a lot of indie, alternate, and emo rock. My Chemical Romance, Wallows, The Killers, Queen, Bring Me The Horizon, Los Campesinos, all that rock stuff. I'd hop into my father's car early in the morning and I'd just hear the loudest metal rock on full volume. I know the bands I mentioned aren't metal rock at all- he just never influenced us on metal too heavily.

Other than game soundtracks and electroswings, I've had my phases with artists like Melanie Martinez and Olivia Rodrigo. Weirder phases are artists like Lemon Demon, Jack Stauber, Sodikken, Penelope Scott, and Vocaloid (Hatsune Miku, Flower, Kagamine Rin, etc)- you know, artists that would probably fall under the spectrum of neurodivergence.

Currently, I'm going through a vintage music phase; 1930s-1960s hits like Marilyn Monroe, Lesley Gore, Frank Sinatra and The Ink Spots. It's not a very surprising phase considering my interest with electroswing music.

Something about the musical ambience back in the day- paired with the beautiful sound of harmonizing violins and sharp piano, along with the trembly voices of extravagant and charming singers you can picture under a glittering spotlight- just hits so different.

If you guys have any music recommendations from the old vintage days, please feel free to comment! I'd love to give them a listen! :)