coding projects and laziness

I procrastinate a lot, that's it. 

I FINALLY finished my c++ project, after almost a month, It was a relative easy project, so u ask: why it took you so long? because I'm lazy, no excuse. 

However I'm trying to change that, I'm afraid of forcing myself and then loosing my interest, I'm screwed if that happens because, what am i going to do with my life? this is everything that I know how to do

And sadly i think i'm in fact loosing a bit of the passion i had when i was 14/15

Hopefully it comes back because it was my dream to work with tech and I don't think it's fair with myself from years ago that worked so hard just for me to trow it all in the trash because I'm lazy 

So, I'm going to get better, study more and do more projects :) 

Anyway, this was very random, sorry 

byeee

- ella