self sabotage

imagine ruining your life, relationship

god this shit feels like a lobotomy. i have no emotions after what has happened. i dont know how to comfort myself, i do see myself texting him but it looks pointless. unnecessary. down right stupid. 

i wonder what i should do. i dont have a clue now. 

i dont.

..

aren't u scared ill hurt u as well?

i hurt your friend. 

girls be like "🩷💕" and is a monster.

my mental illness makes me a monster, i want to go back in time. so i never met him, to save him from me. myself. the person i am with all this coated hatred.