i dont have much to say.. except i have a lot to say.

HELO spacehey userz!!

im alright, and good and great and healthy but i just cant help but feel like i need MORE!!!! i want to be on my own, escape the hands that have kept me hostage and made me feel unsafe i want to be free. and i mean im free sorta more than i was, i feel content when im at other peoples houses- actually thats a lie i only really feel at rest when im at my girlfriends house, when im in "my" "home" my skin crawls and jumps and feels like its burning then when my parents talk to me im like a trillion times worse.. but i mean hah what can yu do. ive been stealing my dads alcohol and nicotine because hes stupid and deserves it, then hes all like 

"duurrr oh noo wheres my nicotiNE and LIquor"

where do you think it went detective? but i mean i wouldnt do this shit to him if that hoe handnt of started it. how does he manage to be the worst person imaginable then be dumb. pick a struggle my dude. i thought i was really done with the 'they she he did this to me so im doing this back shit' but when you LIVE with the mother fucker, yeah im not making your life pretty fuck you. plus theres literally no chance of redemption when you do something like he did.

ANYYWAY tired of hearing about my father? good. im tired of tallking. so we're on the same page. ive been indulging in different good things as of recently, but theres also the itch to loose my mind more than i already have. ive been thinking of sneaking out, visiting some people, but i have to figure out how to start my truck with out being seen/ heard by the ops (my parents) which is damn near impossible. for now ill just draw shit and talk to myself. my17th birthday is coming up!!! im very excited to celebrate it this year with no problems and people i love!!!!!!!! ZOMG WAIT okay so my girlfriend's birthday is literally the day before mine so we're celebrating together!! im so fucking excited, its gonna be invader zim themed and we're gonna have like a mixture of nerd geek shit cupcakes, because i HEART DECORATING! im gonna do fuckin' chicas cupcake from fnaf for one batch and then a buncha creeper ones from minecraft its gonna be so sick. i would incorporate jerma, but i dont think anyone would understand but urrrgghhh like uh i dunno i feel like i need to look like more of a freakoziod loser than i already am lolz okay, 18th birthday is gonna be jerma themed because thats so fucking funny im gonna print his fucking face on my cake and get that one cardboard cut out of him with his waist kinda to the side and hes waving someone please tell me they know what the fuck im on about please his shirt is blue i think tell me you know the jerma picture please its so funny i swear if you knew youd be laughing so hard i promise just look it up itll pop up and youll recognise it actually dont do that because then when you finally see what im referencing itll be extra not funny and i wouldve just completely wasted your time with a unfunny google stock photo of a gay looking twink i mean twitch streamer

goodbye