the inside deets with malice ( entry 3 )

the NOBODY ASKED FOR THIS edition ‼️

surviving . January 24th, 2024

so a lot has happened . like . a metric ton and more and im extremely tired but . im alive :] i know i havent been here at all but everyone who has me on twitter youve seen my mental illness its bad like really bad ive been struggling but yeah GARBAGE DISPOSAL COUGH

uhh i guess a rundown of each month would catch everyone up to speed ! here we go

August 2023: honestly i barely remember this month i was still mourning my grammama i think i was taking like two gummies a week at this point lmfao

September 2023: cut things off with a best friend of two years that was teetering on a situationship bc they just turned out to be kind of a dickhead despite me molding my entire schedule to theirs , letting them get away with shit and then also spending $500+ on them . i dont regret anything i did but i am very glad i stood up for myself and shut it down bc i care about myself a bit more than i used to . i made mistakes too but their disrespect towards me was not worth my mental and physical health . also saw janelle monae in concert shes so hot

October 2023: I GOT MY FIRST TATTOO , ITS BIG AS HELL ACTUALLY — its nishiki's irezumi on my right thigh . i love it , i love my wife , and it makes me look hot as hell . sat through a full 6 hour session in one sitting and barely flinched >:] — turned 21 on October 4th , celebrated on Nishiki's birthday which was October 8th ( happy 55th babygirl ) by drinking , baking a cake and making my shrine for Nishiki , and i found out i love cocktails and pure whiskey :p ( im still a piece of shit stoner dw i love my gummies )

best part of October was the Sonic Symphony in Chicago with my whole family , i cried and screamed my heart out to every damn song and made a fool of myself but it was totally worth it PLUS i got to sing with Dave Vives during City Escape into the mic and we touched foreheads so like . yeah . best night of my entire life . im going again in June this year KWDHDJDGDJDJS

November 2023: uhh my uncle from New York visited for Thanksgiving . he made blan manje and i found god . barely remember this month either . lots of family matters happened

December 2023: picked guitar back up !! really happy about it honestly , im way better at rhythm guitar kind of things and techniques but im still working on fingering and solos rn . i learned JUDGEMENT -SHINPAN- , Ocean Avenue , Drain You , and Super Survivor from budokai tenkaichi 3 that month teehee

NOW YOURE UP TO SPEED !!! hooray

( disclaimer: i skipped a bunch of shit just bc my memory is also shit lmfao but i mean this was the important stuff tbh )

graphic design is still not my passion , sorry if this burns your eyes

but while a lot of shit happened , ive been making a lot of friends . ive had friends stick around and support my decision after the falling out i had , ive learned that a lot of people still love me and im eternally grateful . im almost 8 months clean and while im not in the best place right now , i am very happy . so if you read this or if you dont , just know that you matter and i think youre really cool anyway .

im going on a train to chicago on friday to look Yoko Taro in the eyes for the second time in my life . i might make an imgur folder of some pics i wanna share since im the insane person who only uses Spacehey on mobile through desktop mode ★

Published by MALICE+

the inside deets with malice ( entry 3 )

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