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TW: self-harm, suicide, eating disorder, drug abuse
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I am not sure if I'm happy with my life, now I get it "I am a teenager" and "I've barely lived" but Jesus the way the world is turning out I'm not sure if I wanna live to see it, I live in a stupid small town with literary no way out, everyone I know lives here so I'm basically stuck, I have no safe spaces. and I get it there are much worse places to live but god I wish I didn't live in a hole where everyone judges you no matter what, I'm just a bug in someone else's life, an inconvenience. all I do is wake up do school and sleep, sometimes I'll take a bunch of pills or self-harm to feel something but it's all useless, it only lasts for a little.
I wish I could go somewhere bigger, like California, Philly, or New York, where it is loud and big, where I feel pain and hope things will get better. this small town is the only thing I have though, I'm weirdly attached to it, I've always lived here it has always been my home but I know it is terrible here but its all i have.
that's it lol just needed too talk about it lol :)
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n•cturnal
I know this is a little silly and people have mixed opinions on this but it does get better. You will find what you're looking for as long as you continue to look for it. Maybe try focusing on positive outlooks on life? Changing ur perspective might make things as they are more interesting or at least bearable.
And not to be that person but caring moreso for yourself will make you feel better. Coming from a person who's been there. It may seem like the only choice or at least the choice you want to make right now and i understand that but please at least try to stay safe, your life matters.
xXxN3onK1ller666xXx
I too feel strangled by my small town my friend, honestly it gets worse after highschool. WAY more monotonous, so better hope you can get into a good city college or something, that's my advice.