vent

I wish I could sleep tonight

I haven't feel quite well this days, maybe is 'cause the lack of sleep, or maybe the isolation, maybe is because I have to go back 2 school in two weeks and I don't know if I'm ready. tbh it's overwhelming the idea of the things they expect from me, or the fact that I feel like i'm going to be a failure for everyone again...

I'm not sure of where I want to go, I feel like everyine have a plan but me... I know I want to get out of here, I don't wanna live in this country forever, but being honest i don't really know if i want to be alive.

i'm so tired and i think tht's pretty ironical because i'm not doing something productive, i am so scared 

i feel like no matters how hard i try it is never going to be enough.

i don't know how to do this

the medication is not working and i told that to the doctor and he change only one pill for another, I i took that pill bfore and the doctor just said that maybe this time it could work... i am afraid that i don't get better ever.

i'm loosing hope again)):