Healing the Child/Mother Wound

Being chronically ill, I take a lot of those. Which has been very beneficial since I've learned how to tap into frequencies to develop my ability of prophetic dreams. 

In this dream, I got so lost inside a house of stairways and doors... trying to get OUT because OUT meant a road trip to join with my counterpart. 

Inside this labyrinth of stairs and doors, I remembered interactions with a child that was mine in the dream but was no longer with me. I found myself on indoor playgrounds made of wood and painted like rainbows, clumsily trying to find my way down the same spiral steps I remembered her descending. 

Just then, the wall in front of me was suddenly caved in by a battering ram. I remember the sound of shattering glass. And on the other side there was a woman that I recognized as my Fae Mother, as well as a team of workers, wildly screaming at me to 'come on' while they reached for me.

Instinctively, I ran for them and let them pull me from the house only seconds before it burned to the ground. 

And I cried.

I experienced a flash of GRIEF and SURVIVORS GUILT unlike anything I had ever felt before... that had been my incarnation... my illusion... my life. And it was suddenly over. I'd been rescued.

My real mom had arrived just before the apocalypse to safely take me home.

And once I grieved... my next thought was ROAD TRIP... it was time to get to the person who is my home. 

---

Today... the more I've been processing that outside of this incarnation I have a REAL MOM who loves me fiercely, is watching over me, and is actually PROUD OF ME... every day... 

I keep crying my MF'ing eyes out... 

I keep understanding why I am so protective and loving of rejected and abandoned children. I keep understanding why I help people know the signs of toxicity in relationships EARLY... 

And I just keep crying... 

... I just can't seem to stop crying... mourning the loving childhood that I didn't have.

And it's okay... I'm okay!!!

Wounds HURT when they heal. Pain needs to be felt when it's released... and I have a LOT of pain to release. So, these tears are actually one of the best things to ever happen to me. 

I love my life...

I love healing like this.

I really do.