I think he thinks that I like him, and I also think that he thinks that I think that he likes me

Alright, let's unravel this tangled web of emotions, shall we?

So, there's this guy... I know, I know, there's always a guy, but hear me out!

In my last post, I mentioned him, the one who's been on my mind. I'll admit, I do fancy him, but here's the twist – I don't want him catching wind of that. 

Boosting his ego like that? 

No, thank you.

Now, in the midst of fancying him, there's this weird ambivalence. Remember when I said I was getting bored? Well, it's a yes and a no....

It's not just the me getting bored part, it's him just suddenly dropping the "girlfriend" bomb, making me go, "Uhhh." 

Now you see why I couldn't spill this tea in my last blog because, you guessed it, he reads it.

(He claims he's my "number one fan")

The situation is complicated, okay? Yes, he has a girlfriend, but rumor has it he's not head over heels for her. Awkward, right? 

Oh gods am I a terrible person? I swear, I'm a girl's girl. 

Cue Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend" for dramatic effect.

I solemnly swear I'm just being a friend. It's not my fault! When the whole fancying-him phase started, I had no clue about the girlfriend situation, and we just click so well. Like, really well. Like he's literally me in the opposite gender. 

"Come on, cinepaola, you're just friends, remember?"

Right, yes, just friends. Let's keep it that way.

But hold on, they haven't seen each other in over two months? He practically lives with our friend group or me and has mastered the art of turning off his phone. What kind of relationship is that? 

Seriously.

Plus, he's always cracking jokes about her cheating on him. Yup, you read that right – she cheated on him. They've only been together for like three months, two of which she's been out of town.

 Crazy, right?

Am I terrible for even thinking about this? Trust me, I'm trying my darnedest to friendzone him. I'm putting in the effort. Really hard effort. 

But...

I think he thinks that I like him, and I also think that he thinks that I think that he likes me.