having a crush.

Does anyone else think that having a crush is kinda like a horrific parasite. it's like a little voice that sits on my shoulder sitting around, and then all of a sudden there's a person, and then it goes like. 

"uh uh uh, you can't speak to him, no no no" 

and im forced to just hope and pray that the smile on my face goes down just a little bit before someone sees me grinning ear to ear, and if you have a lazy parasite. 

which i do. 

then it's WORSE o.m.g. the amount of times that ive been sitting there having a proper full on conversation with them and then they pull something like getting in my face, like IN MY FACE. like so much so that they look like they have 4 eyes. and then. THEN. my little parasite is sitting there like, "well we cant be staring so close into someone's eyes that there are 4 of them WITHOUT feeling something." so then my brain just shuts down which y'know you would think is the ultimate WORST time for the brain to shut down. but no, its flooded with seritonin and then im left staring at them, with my mouth open like a gosh darn fish. hoping to god that im not blushing. 

then, 

then, 

they start speaking to me real quietly, like REAL quietly, and im left staring into their eyes, and praying to god, whom i don't believe in (but i fully respect you if you do) that this person, this dude. cannot see my clear shock, and evident blush.