Everything

I've been listening to Lana Del Rey and Taylor Swift for the past 2 hours (this has become a religious ritual for me since 2015) and I was just thinking about their lyrics and how they are 2 literal geniuses. Sometimes I think people hate them so much because they can't understand the meaningful messages and the depth of their lyrics. Like "Now you hang from my lips like the gardens of Babylon, with your boots beneath my bed, forever is the sweetest con", "You have no room for light, love is lost on you."

Like what.

I just don't understand why anyone would hate them. I understand if their music is not your thing but you don't have to hate them. 

I have so much school work to do. I need to write two long essays, read a 200 page book and study for 5 tests. All for next week. School is so stressful for literally no reason. Like what's the point. And then my teacher goes and says that we don't know what stress is because she had her daughter back when she was still in university and had to study until 3am. I felt bad for her when she said that but just because she was more stressed than us doesn't mean that we can't be stressed too. I feel kinda selfish for saying that but it's the truth.

I try so hard to get perfect grades and I've succeeded to do so until now but I'm scared that the day I fail is near. My mom said that everyone fails in life and it's normal if I fail once but it's just so terrifying to fail. 

I've also noticed that writting here is way easier and motivational than writting on paper. I begged my mom to get me one of those vintage journals because I love writting online so I thought that it would be the same on paper and I also thought that I would look like those cool, mysterious girls who journal every day without fail. I did it for a few days and then got back to writting online because I got unmotivated to do it and forgot about that journal for a few months. Maybe it's just not for me but the girls who do it are amazing because I could never. I guess writting on here is easier.

I just discovered this app through a friend and I'm actually sad that I didn't find this earlier because this app is so cool. I'm trying to decide on what layout I should use but I can't decide. I will probably choose one now and change it again tomorrow and so on. 

It's so cold where I live right now, it's -7 degrees. 

SpaceHey will now be my sacred place to vent forever. 

xoxo

-L-