Report Blog Entry
, mrow goodmorning :> ive definetly had a much better day then yesterday so far, even though its only 11 am! ive been up since around 8, cleaning and organizing my room. it was really a disaster in here! i organized my shelf and my table, theres lots of bones and statues and plants there.
i still need to sweep and take dishes in but im very proud of myself for picking up in here because it was really gross in here.
im doing so much better because yesterday i had a pretty exhausting meltdown.
what for u ask? well i was feeling extremly lonely, cooped up, my rooms a disgusting mess,
and i tried to get my cat to lay with me but he wasnt having it.. few other things i dont fully remeber. probably just sensory stuff.
bit later after some my little pony,
i was holding him crying, already overwhelmed in bed
and a whole fucking tree fell on my trailer! (from the icestorm we are having.) (im ok,, no damage to the trailer somehow..)
and so he scratched the shit out of me from being scared
that just triggers it for me and im just sobbing and screaming and crying untill i wear myself out and lay down. i know it lasted so long but i just dont remeber it.
and its always so weird waking up after that. im sure some of you know.
my moms being really sweet to me and shes taking me out for sushi :) i think she can tell ive had a pretty lonely couple of days. im the kind of person who needs to see friends every day, and being stuck at the top of this hill just fucking sucked.
i think since i have the energy and she doesnt ill clean the house for her, and i can make some money to get myself a new calico critter ot something.
in a way im happy for that meltdown? because i think i had a lot of pent up things i needed to get out even if it was. screaming and excruciating and so uncomfortable. i remember feeling pretty numb and sad yesterday and the day before. and i feel refreshed today because of what i did as soon as i woke up. take a shower, take care of my teeth and hair, pick up my room,
and its like a new day in here. :)
Comments
Displaying 0 of 0 comments ( View all | Add Comment )