getting older,

Ngl, when I was 12, I felt like I was 12, for like 3 years, but now that im 16 i feel like time is just continously moving faster, AND ITS SCARING ME.

Like people are really asking me what college im going to and im genuinely scared. Like of course I want to get away and be my own person as a thought, but the action of being self dependent and not being able to see my family really scares me, not being able to rely on someone when sht hits the fan scares me. 

Everything that comes with growing up genuinely scares me because it feels like im not even supposed to be experiencing most of this stuff yet like, relationships, intimacy and even something as simple as learning to drive.

It just does not feel right to hear that I have only one more year of school, one more year of dance, and then before I know it im 18. 

When I was 13/14/15 I loved to have conversations about my future like schooling, and even where I wanted to live but as reality SLOWLY set in i realize how expensive it is and extremely draining it could be to possibly pay for all of this stuff. 

Anyway, I like the look and thought of graduating, going to prom, going to college, being on my own, but not exactly the action of doing so. 

The world is a scary place. :|