Prose about masking and stuff :p

I was always looking for approval, needing confirmation I was doing the right thing. I wanted to fit in and be like everyone else. I was desperate to be seen; to have friends who wouldn't judge my true self. I laughed at jokes I didn't get, agreed with statements I thought were wrong. A mask was bolted to my face and I couldn't remove it. I thought myself to be unique, with no one else to relate to. I took on the interests of those around me, abandoning my own. The only thing I held onto was the only thing I ever had in common with anyone else. I found their hobbies to be boring, but I played along. Being bored was better than being alone. I needed individuality. I was tired of upholding a image I didn't understand, playing by the rules of a game I was only spectating. I began to slowly introduce my peers to the things I kept hidden, anticipating their responses. I told myself that being happy is what mattered most. There's no use holding on to something I didn't want in the first place. I lost acquaintances. they weren't meant to stay long anyways. I found people who understood me, a place where I fit in without the need to pretend.