Procrastination and Laziness

These past few months, I have been pretty much far from being mentally fulfilled. My goal started to become blurred out and I was just burnt out with school work right when the academic year just started. I was just fatigued, no adequate sleep, and most importantly I started to delay my work. Delaying my tasks led to nothing but major worries and anxiety. Doing work the last minute with nothing but complete stress. I completely lost focus of work to the point that I lost sight of my future vision and felt like I had no purpose. Then I just felt worse and worse each day, slowly killing myself, ignoring my dreams, wasting time on the internet, wasting time through day dreaming. Each day being a monotony of rushing and anxiety. Then last week, I simply just thought about myself, staring at that miserable and lousy report card of mine.

And there at that moment, came a big amount self awareness and realization. I have only been indulging for the sake of not going through the pain of putting in work. Made me think through how my friends and acquaintances around me did put in effort on what they wanted to achieve and they were mentally fulfilled. It took me a pretty long time to identify the problem that caused me all of those anxiety-ridden weeks. Identifying the problem or cause is the most important thing to solving anything that's troubling. Imagining my habit of laziness erased from my life's scenario is just what I want, but at the same time, despite being productive I also imagine that mundane, boring and uneventful cycle of days (Which is something I stopped complaining about long ago since most of life is really just the monotony), but it is easy to ignore that thought. Now I am working through cutting off this god-forsaken habit of ignoring progress towards what I have always wanted to achieve. Sometimes, all it takes is just you to be alone with your thoughts and think of what's causing all of the troubles that keep following you from behind.

Remember to do what is always best for you.