little life update

it's afternoon on january 2nd and soon i will be omw to my second house party of the year. i much prefer them to bars or clubs, but it's still something i would rather avoid, yet have no heart to miss. like, it has potential to be fun, but autism can quickly make it bad, you know? at least my darling with me and my friends are a bunch of nerds, so it shouldn't be too stressful.

i look like a bum and feel like a bum. recently my 'style' is loose clothing on loose clothing to avoid overstim. i need wardrobe update, but also have bills coming up. isn't it crazy that u need to pay 200 euro just so a surgeon can put you to sleep? wild. 

ngl i really need to be better with spending. or earning money? with my career changes, additional bullshit fees from my shit renting company and manic episode rly fucked me up. i'm trying to relax and take it one step at the time, be careful with my spending, but i wish i could splurge on my loved ones more. especially with my darling's, and then my dad's birthday coming up. sigh, januaries are hard. if i was still active on insta, i could take art comissions, but i really have no energy on social media... welp. 

i am in need of more good historical fiction set in medieval times. no fantasy though. if i don't find anything before i finish my book (which will be very soon), i'm just gonna read up a research paper on herbology of middle ages.

sorry for no link, but song of the day is:

'crazy, mad, insane' by beast in black :)