A Spoonie New Year's Eve

I'm a spoonie. I don't remember what I did for New Year's Eve last year. In fact, of the last several years, only a few stand out. Usually my friends are partying while I stay home. I miss out on a lot of stuff. But this night has so much hype around it, and it can feel lonely and sad that I'm not out there creating memories with what feels like everyone else. 

Again this year I had to sit out another demonstration at the jail, where my friends all went to set off fireworks and cheer up the prisoners. It feels like I'm missing everything right now.

But really, it's just another night in my room. Various friends have reached out via text. I'm roleplaying online with a new friend. I'm not alone. It's the hype that burns. Fuck the hype.