Doomsday, Lizzy Mcalpine w/ Crowley from Good Omens

Dying hurt, and he knew that, of course, he did he was a demon, he'd been constantly surrounded by death and naturally knew many ways to die 

Disincorporation was different, it meant only leaving his material body, dying on the other hand, it had not been something he had experienced

falling, he took it was the closest feeling he'd ever have to death 

or at least that was what he thought, as he sat in the driver seat of his Bentley his plants surrounding him and somehow he was back there in Soho in front of the fucking bookshop 

why was he here? he'd like an answer to that question too

he looked outside, It was dark now Maggie and Nina were long gone, and the lights inside the bookshop were closed no sign of Muriel inside 

he hadn't died he knew that, so why is it that he doesn't feel alive, It's been like that since-...

His grip on the steering wheel tightened and with a shaky but deep breath he opened the car door and went out and onto the bookshop's front door

his hand hovers on the door handle, and he hesitates to look up inside the windows of the bookshop, he knew the only thing he'd find were countless books and bookshelves but somewhere in his mind he hoped that if he looked up he'd see his angel at his desk reading a book, with his reading glasses and his smile

He doesn't look up, his hand falls to his side and he walks back to his car and drives, he doesn't look back he knows he'll end up back here anyway, he feels so little yet so much at the same time

if you ask him personally "How many times had you felt human" he'd answer very little he's a demon, after all, naturally he'd lie

but if he were, to be honest, he'd felt human ever since he fell, he'd always felt too human, well too much for an immortal anyway

but right now, as he drove away from the only familiar thing that had stayed for more than a millennium, a place that at the very deepest part of his brain was labeled home, and somewhere deeper in his mind he knew It wasn't the place it was the person that lived there

as he drives in the quiet night alone with his thoughts, once again he'd felt too vulnerable, with too many emotions, too human 

He hadn't died, but he felt like he did