im online rn because of this little shit (rant but pls hear me out, actually)

My mom likes to poke me, a lot. 

And i kept trying to tell her politely that i didnt like it, she kept doing it. Its been going on since i was a child, im a teen now.

I was on the bed and my mom decided to poke the underside of my foot, which is very sensitive and i hate when people touch my sensitive parts. I then quickly yelled NO. Then she smiled at me, knowing what she did was wrong.

And then she had the AUDACITY to be mad n like "why did u yell at me? do u not respect me?"

My dad luckily took my side, saying that everyone knew i hated that, that made her furious, but i still had to apologise for yelling at her. I tried explaining to her how I always tried to tell her as nicely as possible that she had to stop, she always brushed me off and does it again.

When I was 11, she had told me "I am your mother (deadname), I dont need to respect your boundaries" and i cried that night

And she had lately been telling me that I don't know my own body, that it wouldnt know the difference if i read something saying "kill yourself" n think its directed towards me. Which is confusing ik, im also confused. wdym i will become depressed after seeing something angsty i wrote for an aesthetic widget only I will see, knowing its a joke??????