my perfume collection + mini-reviews of all of them

• fils de dieu by état libre d’orange - this is one of my favorite spicy perfumes in the sense that it smells like actual spices you would use to flavor food. to me, it reminds me so much of chai lattes or rice pudding, but i’ve seen other people describe it smelling like steamed rice, pho, thai soup and horchata. it's a very genderless scent. i love rice pudding with cinnamon so that’s what it reminds me of, and it manages to do it without any hint of sweetness.

• coromandel by chanel - this is just the greatest chanel fragrance ever made and possibly even the best patchouli fragrance ever made. if you hate patchouli, you haven't smelled this. if you like patchouli, you are doing yourself a massive disservice not sampling this. this one is also completely unisex, and unbelievably expensive smelling. so much rich resinous amber and it also smells very milky and buttery and a little bit tart from bitter oranges. it's so so insanely sexy and indulgent.

• shalimar parfum initial by guerlain - sadly they don't make this one anymore and the price is going up accordingly. this is the ultimate 50s pinup girl, beauty mark above your lip and ostrich feather robe smell. like coromandel above it i don't really wear this one often unless i really am wearing something incredibly nice or going somewhere super nice, and i'm really feeling myself. this one is strongly on the feminine side and definitely a fuck me kind of perfume. it has this very vintage cosmetics powdery smell but also a ton of smoldering vanilla and caramel on like this bed of smoky ashes and candied sour citrus.

• la fin du monde by état libre d’orange - this is the most recent one i bought a few months ago. i wear it every day. what is it supposed to smell like? according to the perfumer; popcorn, black pepper and gunpowder. it is genuinely very buttery, a little salty and savory, and definitely kind of smoky in a very herbal aromatic way. it's also supposed to have sesame and carrot seed. all of that sounds bizarre but i promise you it's very wearable. to me it is mostly a very subtle and light resinous incense type smell with some salty savoriness to it that kind of smells like sweat but in a good way. it's really classy and you wouldn't offend anyone wearing this because it barely lasts lmao.

• replica tea escape by margiela - a very rich, milky, creamy indulgent matcha latte with some herbal qualities to it thanks to some citrus and mint and mate notes. it is very, very rich and thick. it really does smell like a matcha latte made with pure buttermilk. they also don't make this one anymore and it is being sold for crazy prices online these days. it also has lots of jasmine so it reminds me a lot of jasmine oolong tea too. just an amazing tea scent that actually smells like tea, though in a very indulgent way rather than a light and refreshing way. i would say it is unisex though slightly leaning feminine.

• replica coffee break by margiela - lavender, fresh coffee beans, vanilla and a little bit of a dude cologne smell for a more unisex vibe. definitely a true unisex scent. i would describe it as a vanilla herbal type smell with a bit of coffee though, definitely not a super coffee-rich fragrance. it smells like having a warm and milky spiced latte in a barber shop while they're using all those old school shaving soaps and beard oils. very androgynous smell that is not as imposing as the first couple i wrote about and can be worn a little more casually.

• close by gap - they also don't fucking make this anymore lol i don't know what i'll do once i buy the last bottle there is still out there because nothing else exists like it. i don't know why this random perfume from the gap is one of the best everyday perfumes i've found in my life but it's been the one i wear daily for literal years now. it is one of the few perfumes that claim to have "sea salt" as a note that actually smell salty and savory, while still staying light and easy to wear. it actually smells like salt and sea water with a faint smell of almond and lemon biscotti cookies. but not like sweet cookies, like a very light and savory cookie. it's just great. very salty but fresh, smells like sweat in a good and clean and put together way.

• blackout by derek lam - i have no idea if they still make this line of fragrances, all i know is that they absolutely bombed and no one bought them and they go for absolutely dirt cheap online nowadays. blackout is a rich, hot, waxy, herbal, but ultimately very gentle and wearable tea scent -- if you're the type to like the idea of the tea trend in fragrances but find the green tea ones too clinical and white floral you have to try this one. it's sensual, warm, intimate -- exactly what i'd want from a tea scent. it's supposed to smell like masala chai but i don't really get that -- definitely a lot of black tea but the sweetness isn't there and it has a lot of vetiver which makes it more of a unisex vibe. i could see how someone would read this as a cheaper smelling dude's deodorant scent. i still like it though, and it definitely smells like bitter black tea in a really cozy and androgynous way.