Being emotional

In the past months I have been catching myself not only thinking about my old relationships and friendships, but also my current ones. While I do regret some things not turning out how I wanted them to, I am still grateful for my past as I would not be how I am right now without them.

It has been hard to see my boyfriend move away, as well as my best friend, while I'm still stuck in my little village in the middle of nowhere. But as there is no other option for me, I decided to befriend new people from my class. And with befriending I mean constantly talking to them, learning everything about their interests and change myself to a, for them, more likeable version of myself. And it did turn out well. Until it all stopped.

I'm a very emotional person, I need physical touch, I need someone I can talking about my interests with. And they do not like that. Whenever I bring it up I just get rejected. They view me as way too emotional and tell me I shouldn't be so hurt all the time, which I am not. But I get frustrated by their constant accusations and them telling me what I am feeling. So it does make me emotional in a way.

I wish they would understand and start to get actually interested in what I like. To get to know me. Or I want my old friends back. Both would be fine.