Hypersexuality

I hate being hypersexual. I over sexualize myself even tho I'm scared of sex but like I want it to bad and I seek it from random strangers and they are willing bc people are horny. Also sorry if it seems like I vent on my blogs alot this is just the only place I feel safe to talk about how I feel. But yeah, I hate being hypersexual and how I actually like being insulted and being in pain. It makes me so mad at myself. I always feel guilty afterwards when I get someone to pay attention to me sexually. I hate it sm.