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he / him | 23
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https://blog.spacehey.com/hush
Category: Life
sometimes i feel second to everything and everyone. as long as their needs are met, it doesn't matter if mine are. as long as they're doing okay, it doesn't matter if i am. im just the convenient friend, i fill a role. a last resort if all others are busy. the backup, go-to afterwards. the stand in, the understudy. » Continue Reading
Category: Life
how i manage to keep making things worse is beyond me. i always think im saying the right thing, and then it's so easily misunderstood because not everyone thinks the same way, and i feel like an asshole. even trying to reiterate and explain what i meant seems to just dig me in a deeper hole. i feel like im destined to ruin all of my connections. i dont know what it is about me that finds the easi... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
AUUGHGHIUHDFIUWAHFIOSHUIGSEGF !!!!!!!!!!! anyway, i fucking hate getting into arguments with my friends over stuff that isn't my fault. or a better way to explain it, getting the shit end of the stick when they argue with people im associated with. why am i getting the consequences when i wasn't even involved ??? furthermore, why am i the one apologizing and trying to make amends when i didnt even... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
big update from my last post, i am no longer in a relationship with that partner anymore, as more and more lies began to unravel and show themselves. it's been a long process but i finally built up the courage to not only break up, but completely remove myself from having any contact with him. there was just too much going on, and it wasn't a great situation to be in. i would say things ended alr... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
recently coming to terms with the fact my partner in my importantship (the term i use as an aromantic person with a "partner") is a liar?? and extremely hypocritical. he recently broke up with his gf and calls her manipulative and an emotional abuser, and doesnt want any of our friends talking with her because he doesnt want to associate with her. which is understandable. but tell me » Continue Reading
Category: Life
i feel sick and paranoid all the time over the smallest things but it just happens too often to be a coincidence anymore. i recently "broke up" with my boyfriend because we were arguing far too much and he was leaving it all up to me to fix every time and i couldn't mentally handle it anymore. i also saw texts he sent to mutual friends while he was drunk telling them just how awful of a bf i am an... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
just when i think things are gonna start working out for me, something tears that down. for once, life felt like it was finally on the right track. maybe it still is, and im just so used to feeling bad that i dont believe i deserve to feel good. is that normal? or, common? you feel happy, but you have to make yourself sad at some point to balance it out? i dont know. i dont think that's normal, or... » Continue Reading
Category: Life
going through the worst breakup of my life. i dont even know if i can go into details here, but to sum it all up he kissed someone else and i ended up breaking up with him a few days later. it hurt so much cause i truly loved him, he was my world and my everything, and he still is to me. not only that, but some other ex-friends of mine are suddenly trying to reach out from seemingly nowhere and i ... » Continue Reading
Category: Blogging
lately a lot of shit has went down in my personal life. i've never been good at letting my emotions out, so inevitability i bottle them in without even trying. i was raised to not let things bother me, so i never learned how to process my emotions in a healthy way. i just react in anger and bottle everything up until i can't take it anymore, but even then i don't know how to just let these feeling... » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
lately i've been trying to take some time for myself. my mental health seems to be plummeting by the seconds. everything around me is falling apart fast. my job, my friendships, my relationship. everything is going downhill fast. i don't know what to do with myself anymore... » Continue Reading
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Category: Blogging
i don't really know what i'm doing with my life. i never really had any set goals, except for the long term dream of starting a band. but that's nothing more than a dream at this point. i wouldn't even know where to start if i ended up being able to get the stuff or people together for a band. i could also be an actor, i think. i mean, that's what i go to school for currently. i would just hate to... » Continue Reading
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