My first entry

this is cool, I've always wanted to keep my own personal blog, I've never had a diary before but I've always wanted one. My handwriting is awful. i hate looking at the words i write so that's probably deterred me from keeping my own journal, and every other platform feels very public. i think documentation is important, i like the idea of information about someone being fed through personal entries like those horror games that have you read through the last writings of someone who was murdered. and all you're left with are the words of someone who no longer exists. i often find myself building a weird disconnected affinity with these characters through their writing. i don't really know what pushed me to start this, i just had a feeling that if i was ever going to start writing these entries it should be now. maybe in the future, these entries help build some strange cyber rapport with someone I'll never know, if so, i hope this helps you feel less alone, i find connections like that comforting as well. i don't think time is linear, so as you are reading this, I'm writing it, wondering who else is gonna read these words. my memory is getting worse every year, so i think writing these entries would be beneficial to look back on as well, I'm terrified of forgetting who i was. I'm just glad i have a place to write without the weight of publicising it, i think when i advertise anything personal, it skews how i interact within that space, so I'm gonna try my best not to.
so that's my first entry, maybe ill write more, maybe i won't.