Very long Kenny McCormick hc

!!!Small rant before we start!!! (You can skip if ur just here for the hc’s)

I find that a lot of people who hate Kenny or call him overrated just see him as a poor horny kid when he has a lot more depth to his character than just those two things. Actually, I find that whenever people call ANY character overrated, they’re just trying to be different or they’re being shallow. 
If a character is popular, it’s probably because they’re a good character. I’m not saying Kenny isn’t overrated, because he is, I’m just saying that there’s no reason to dislike a character just because a bunch of people like them

(People who death threat other people for not liking Kenny are a whole different story…)

Anyways onto the headcanons!! (Disclaimer: none of these are real or confirmed, it’s mostly just me being silly and projecting my problems onto a child)

Kenny has definitely not had a new toothbrush in years and it’s rly messed up and more likely to cause cavities than not brushing so he just. Doesn’t brush. instead he kinda just gurgles some water and calls it a day.

Also he’s stopped brushing for so long that he forgot how to do it so whenever he’s at a friends house for a sleepover or some shit and they have a spare toothbrush he has to get his teeth brushed for him

(His teeth are fucked up to hell and back, but this changes due to my hc that he changes a lil every time he dies  idk maybe he’ll wake up with less teeth than normal which is kinda terrifying when I say it like that)

The type of kid to swallow his loose teeth (on accident or not) and call it a snack

He DESPERATELY needs braces/dental help but obviously, nobody’s gonna get it for him, so as he gets older it just gets worse and worse, which is part of the reason he wears the hood all the time

(Totally not projecting my dental issues onto him)

Due to being poor and suffering from malnutrition he also

- is super duper skinny, like the orange parka literally envelopes his whole body so he looks pretty silly in it

- has a severe lack of an appetite. This combined with the fact that he genuinely feels like he lives for other people and not himself, and also not wanting to be as much as a burden to his family, he literally has to force himself to shovel food down his throat to survive. He also gives a portion of his food to Karen all the time

- has low energy levels and is constantly tired all the time, so he’ll end up laying in bed for hours not doing anything + one time he stayed in bed for the entire day and everyone thought he went missing, this will usually happen more often as he wakes up from more traumatic deaths

- has a hard time doing simple tasks, but he’s kinda grown used to the fatigue and shit so he gets SOME things done… kinda

- will kinda just pass out whenever bc dehydration

- he started drinking coffee (picked up from Tweek, bc I headcanon them as cousins, sorry twenny shippers) , because without it he will literally never be able to get the energy to function

- passes out immediately after the energy boost dies down tho

- Tweek sneaks him free coffee at school so his parents don’t know

- unfortunately, symptoms of malnutrition also include taking a longer time recovering from sickness, and wounds taking longer to heal

- tbh I think he’s suffering equal amounts in hell and on Earth

- he does terrible in school because poor concentration, he literally cannot pay attention in class for the life of him (also malnutrition symptom)

- so he copies off of Kyle’s answers, who lets him copy because I think he knows in a way

- he also feels cold, like his skin is literally cold to the touch, and he also actually feels cold, which is why he chooses the parka even though it looks weird. It’s kinda creepy tbh, everyone says he feels like a corpse

- bruises easily and is super pale, rashes, dry skin, thin hair, achy joints, literally everything physical that could be wrong with this guy is wrong

- reminder that he’s still 9 years old and going through all of this

OH SHIT I ALMOST FORGOT THIS PART BUT

he also has canker sores, yknow those little white things that you get in your mouth for no reason that hurt a lot? That’s what they’re called, and they’re caused by “emotional stress, dietary deficiencies, menstrual periods, hormonal changes, food allergies, or trauma in the mouth” yeah this fucker has A TON of these, they’re like on his tongue, his lips, everywhere it’s pretty fucking bad, which makes it extremely painful for him to eat ANYTHING💔💔💔

Also some other stuff that’s not food or teeth related

- He has severe attachment issues due to being neglected by his parents. This causes him to distance himself from people that show any kind of affection towards him and view his closest friends as parental figures. With the people he does trust, he is incredibly clingy 

- dissociates as a coping mechanism 

- very touchy-feely, he likes holding on to people to stay “grounded”

- I’m like 90% sure he has DID, and Mysterion and Princess Kenny are two of his alters, which explains why they are so vastly different