men with handlebar mustaches are the scum of the earth

men with handlebar mustaches are the most vapid, callused brained apes on the planet. not to mention they're all posers who just wanna look like the crusty losers on their fyp, so they think "why don't i get this mustache and start listening to radiohead so bitches with septum piercings will wanna fuck me" like omg consider ending it bro. i personally think they should be shunned and strapped into medeival torture devices so we can all throw tomatoes at them and roast their vinyl collection. men with handlebar mustaches should be outlawed from communicating with the outside world. they should all be locked together in one room with their rolled up jeans and long socks and doc martens and be forced to discuss the same plot points of fight club and donnie darko forever. maybe then they can truly realize they're all the same. and they should be banned from posting fit checks because if i see one more mustached man in a pair of dickies giving me a 360 to some self declared mid west emo song i might combust fr. fuck <3 that was cathartic asf. we should just totally stab caesar vibes. and before u ask who hurt me...YES.